Mother’s Day isn’t just a day for moms, it’s a day for us to celebrate and appreciate all of the wonderful women, mothers, and others in our lives. Choosing how to celebrate Mother’s Day, when your mother is no longer living, can feel challenging.
There are so many ways to observe Mother’s Day. Many of the ways we celebrate are centered around gratitude, acts of service, reflection, and quality time, all of which can be expressed in the same celebratory spirit as if they were right here with you.
Buy Her A Card/Write Her A Letter
There’s something special about putting our feelings into words and putting those words on paper. That’s why so many people still buy paper cards.
Whether you type up an email, draft a handwritten letter, or pick out a traditional Mother’s Day greeting card to sign, you can use that space to thank, honor, and remember your mom.
Get Her Flowers
Fresh-cut or store-bought flowers are a great way to celebrate almost every occasion. If you want to go the traditional route, many people buy flowers to take to their mothers’ graves on the day.
It’s just as much of an honor to set flowers out in your own home (or to bring them to someone else’s), you’ll also have the benefit of being reminded of your loved one each time you see the beautiful blooms.
Make Her Something
Maybe flowers don’t have the right tone for your relationship or you’re looking for something a little more hands-on.
The act of crafting something together with your hands can be its own rewarding activity in and of itself. It can also be a really lovely way to express all of those feelings you have that a card just won’t contain.
It doesn’t really matter what media you use or what you make, it’s about the connection and emotion behind the act. If you’re pleased with it, go ahead and hang it up on your own fridge!
Host A Brunch
This could be a spin on an old family tradition or a new thing for you entirely. Getting together with other members of your family for a Mother’s Day brunch is a beautiful way to celebrate.
Swapping favorite stories about the shared caregiver or reflecting on the good times together also strengthens the bonds between the people she loved and cared for.
Explore Her Hobbies
In life, we often get to know one another by sharing activities and interests. Using the same method, we can learn so much about a loved one after they’ve died.
By taking an interest in something that once interested them, we have a unique opportunity to see the world through their eyes for a little bit. You might even learn something new about yourself while you’re at it, too.
Read Her Favorite Book
You may find that you get an even closer, or more in-depth, look at your mother’s world through reading her favorite book.
Even without a physical copy or annotations, there’s still so much that a favorite book can reveal about the reader– philosophies, sense of humor, special interests.
The very same thing applies to watching her favorite movies or listening to her
Visit Her Happy Places
This is yet another way to spend some quality time with your mom through her experiences. You could take it in a couple of different directions, revisiting places you use to go to together or exploring the places that she really loved in life.
Pass On A Family Tradition
One way we can keep our loved ones’ memories alive and instill a sense of connectedness throughout the family is by passing on traditions.
You might share a family recipe, visit a family favorite picnic spot, or share the family motto. Whatever tradition looks like in your family, you can participate in this, whether or not you have children of your own.
Passing the tradition on to the youngest generation or sharing it with friends of the family have the same results– connection and community.
Tell Stories About Her
Similarly, you can honor your mother’s memory by telling stories about her to your own kids, the younger generation, or to anyone who feels like family.
Not only will this strengthen the family ties to her, but it may also help you learn a little more about your relationship with her. Explore those memories and think about why they best represent who she was, and is, to you.
Make A Donation
Making a donation to a cause that someone cares about or is affected by is an incredibly thoughtful gift. And death certainly doesn’t rule your mother out as a recipient.
If the gift is going to be public, remember to include “in memory of” and her name on any forms or checks.
Just like donating money in memory of your mother, you can donate your time to a cause she cared about.
You could even get a group of your family members to volunteer as a team, or go one step further and make this a new family tradition!
Celebrating Mother’s Day when your mother has died is partly about finding what feels good to you. Maybe you want to do all of these things, maybe none of them are appealing.
Whatever you choose to do to honor your mother, make sure you’re honoring yourself and your journey, too.
Photo credit: Lum3n, via Pexels